Tuesday, September 28, 2010

One year

It's been one year since my friend Nikki passed away from leukemia. Not one of those days have I not thought about her and missed her. In the beginning it was a horrible realization every morning. I would wake up and not long after remember that she was gone, and my heart would sink. After awhile I began to know that when I woke up. And my hear would still sink. It was no longer a daily realization but part of the reality of our lives. And I would continue on. Because what else is there to do? But I would still have moments when I had to remind myself that I couldn't call her and tell her what Owen had done that day. Or ask if she and Marc wanted to come for dinner. And gradually I've stopped having those moments. And I no longer cry every day. I can talk about her and tell stories about her and share her with others without breaking down. But there are still plenty of tears.

This quote basically sums up how Nikki touched the lives of everyone who had the pleasure of knowing her.

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.”

We will never be the same for having known her and loved her. She was joyful and passionate and full of life and she left that with us in our hearts. And while I will always miss her every day I know that where she is she is spreading joyfulness and passion and humor and love.


Michele G. said...

I am glad that you have found a little peace with Nikki being gone. It sucks when those we love have to leave us. My brother told me once that it never stops hurting but time does help get you through the day. Hugs to you.

Sarah C. said...

It doesn't seem like a year has passed already. I recall you mentioning her here or on FB and praying for her. I'm so sorry for your loss. You are a wonderful friend - you are clearly keeping her alive with your memories. I do hope it gets easier and you begin to smile when you remember good times the two of you shared. ((HUGS))

emily said...

She sounds like she was an amazing woman. Sending you hugs this fall :)